RED - 2

I began as a visual artist so RED is not so far from the truth of my essential being.  From my first days in school, I was encouraged in art, and was always considered the best artist in my classes, drawing sports cartoons for the Rumford weekly newspaper in high school, earning a scholarship to the Rhode Island School of Design, falling of the road to visual art as I became confused about society and life, beginning to write in small notebooks.

So, RED is not so unusual a creation for me at 77 as I struggle with death, the death of my wife, a beautiful woman to me without parallel, who supported my literary work, and my undisciplined temperament, for so long.  RED reminds me of her - simple, clear, focusing on the good in life, nurturing life, believing in her own creative power as well as mine - living spiritually as the red ribbons live in the moving air dancing from the white birches in the front yard of the home where she grew to adulthood.

RED is life - in the face of death - simple, clear - although I know she will not return and this returns me to horror on some days - to the injustice of life - to the injustice of those who were supposed to care for her in the medicine - RED is life - unusual in the trees on the front yard of wood frame house in a small Maine town - unusual because of the nature of the culture of the community - a surprise -

I had thought of creating such a work with ribbons about a month ago when thinking of my wife.  I miss her.  I want her here with me.  How could I remember her as she was.  How could I say to the world, she was incredible!  I stalled.  I did not follow through because I was unable to find a way to make it work in a practical way .  I let it go, finding it in my mind at one time or other on following days, continuing to dismiss it.  One day I began to clean the back room upstairs in the house because I had to continue now that she was gone.  I came across 8 spools of wide red ribbon which my wife had bought at one time for some use and immediately I cut them at varying lengths, took them to the white birches, tied knots around the branches, letting them fall toward the grass.  When I had finished all 8 spools of ribbon, I was satisfied that it worked, I had done it, as I viewed them moving slowly in a slight breeze.  Later, I would see them move vigorously in a wind.

I felt free - life was with me - my wife had succeeded - she was with me - I knew her - I had created
as well a work of art - a true work of art -

Yes, with the lead of Alexander Calder, and Christo, which simply meant that my love of visual art, which I had not turned away when I abandoned education, for I weekly keep myself abreast of the art world of the day.

RED - she is in the trees -

What next?  I will continue to write the memorial I had begun three months ago which is so very difficult because it means I must deal with intellect as well as spirit.  The creation of RED meant that I could deal with the spiritual alone.  This did not make RED easier than the writing of the memorial.  It meant that I just had to swim within the inspiration and wait for to gain momentum for the moment.

Write, now -